Rumour Round-Up

“Do you have two legs?”

“Have you ever kicked a football?”

“Have you ever called yourself a striker or forward, with regards to the above football kicking?"
If you answered yes to the above questions then you are eligible to be a rumoured transfer target of Aidy Boothroyd, especially if a certain website is to be believed.

Possible transfer targets have included (*deep breath*) Kenny Miller, Freddy Eastwood, Billy Sharp, Heidar Helguson, Jamie Cureton, Christian Benitez, Rohan Ricketts, Stan Collymore (sadly I’m not joking, though they surely must be) and Dena Rosa (who rejected us in favour of League One Southend - stop laughing).

But it’s not just strikers either, other players rumoured to be pulling on a yellow shirt next year include Michael Mancienne, Stewart Cumming and Paul Robinson.

In an outgoing direction, utility man James Chambers has definitely packed his bags and headed to the Crisp Bowl in Leicester, in search of regular football. You can’t really blame him, he’s currently 3rd choice right back, and 3rd choice right midfielder. He leaves with my thanks, and I hope he gets a good reception when he returns to the Vic.

Danny Shittu’s agent has the ear of at least one red-top sports editor and seems intent on getting the man-mountain Premership football (English or Scottish, either’s good apparently) this coming season.

DeMerit’s agent hasn’t got quite as big a mouth, but the occasional rumour is floating around that Jay from the USA is also on the way out. One “journalist” also seems to think that Clarke Carlisle is wanting out after a lack of first-team opportunities last season, forgetting that Carlisle was injured for most of it.

Unfortunately, Boozer is being tracked by a few Premiership clubs, whilst Moses Ashikodi is rumoured to be wanted by Mad Ollie down at Plymouth, which would surprise me, as I think he has a broken leg. It would also appear that Doris is being waved around by Aidy as a make-weight in any deal for a 20-goal-a-season striker.

Hopefully now everyone is back off their holidays we can stop speculating and two months of mad transfer dealings can begin.

Talking of mad transfer dealings, the godfather has splashed out £16.5m on Darren Bent. Is he mad? He could have bought himself a Thierry Henry and a Yassin Moutaoukil for that money.

And finally, I'll finish off with the sketchiest rumour of them all. Two blog comments, an anonymous one on this site, and another from "mike" over at BHaPPY, suggesting Al Bangura wont play next season. Why? Who knows? Maybe it’s someone playing a game to see who’ll pick up a story and run with it, like some elaborate game of inter-web Chinese whispers. We can all do that you know;

My Dad plays golf with someone, who knows someone. I have it on good authority that Alan Smith is on his way to Watford. You heard it here first.

There's Only One Steve Kabba, Thankfully

So, the Steve Kabba deal (I use the word deal advisedly - in the same way being served a half-eaten hamburger and bottle of backwashed lemonade in a restaurant is a deal, it is not a good deal) is under inquiry.

Kabba's merits have been discussed to death elsewhere. Depending on who you talk to, he's either a lazy git with Toblerone-shaped feet and the careful touch of a loved-up rhinocerous, or else a misunderstood and misused dynamo of a goal-getter. Either way, he's probably not for us at the moment.

Could the expose have been instigated by a canny WFC employee eager to get Kabba sent back from whence he came? Of course not, don't be so stupid. But if it quickens his departure and gets Warnock's old boys in some bother - who's complaining? It could leave a Helguson, Earnshaw or Sharp-sized hole in our squad.

And, has already been suggested by at least one wag, could we sell him to a Championship side and insist that he does play against us?